The secret formula for cardiovascular success at the gym has been discovered. It requires just the right mix of NCAA Tournament basketball on a large nearby TV, Jets to Brazil on the headphones and a decent amount of sunlight coming in through the windows. It also helps for the gym not to be mobbed out, reducing the amount of squawky conversations and weird looks in your personal space.

However, this exercise tranquility was almost fatally disrupted by smells. Distracting odors come with the territory when at the gym, but you are expecting the musty and sweaty stuff. What is less expected, and therefore more distracting, are the scents of coffee and old-lady perfume. The idea of drinking coffee while exercising seems completely ridiculous, but it has been substantiated time and time again, including today. As if that thought isn't bad enough, the nose-filling smell of coffee in close proximity is almost nauseating. Maybe coffee drinkers would feel differently about this, but it's hard to imagine. Within minutes of coffee dude showing up, there was the old lady with her hair "done" and jewelry on, that reeked of some Louie the Lilac concoction. What made this all the more troubling what that she was about 20 feet away, but the scent permeated everyone's breathing room. Again, nothing wrong with perfume in principle, but not really a smell compatible with the gym. There are, however, plenty of times where perfume is great and significantly accomplishes its seemingly insignificant purpose.

In closing, just a word about Jets to Brazil. They are/were so insanely good. Perfecting Loneliness is pretty much a perfect soundtrack to anything. Just try it. Same goes for Four Cornered Night.